A couple of weeks ago, I flew to Los Angeles to attend one of the largest real estate conferences in the country, hosted by Tom Ferry.
The last time I attended was back in 2021.
Let's just say a lot has happened since then.
It had been a while, and I was ready for a refresh to hear the latest in real estate, plan, prepare, and, most importantly, surround myself with thousands of agents who execute at a high level and still desire to get better.
There's an energy at those events that is impossible to replicate virtually.
I love them.
They inspire me to dream bigger and see what's possible beyond my current ZIP code and present circumstances.
It keeps me alive.
This time, though, I went in with very few expectations.
I was just present.
Very little posting. Very little recapping.
I sat there thinking about how I currently operate my business.
Where are the gaps?
I jotted down notes and takeaways here and there and debriefed with my team member during lunch breaks.
Then, on the third day, I sat next to an agent from Arizona.
She became my buddy for the rest of the day.
After the conference ended, we sat in the hotel lobby having a drink while she waited for her Uber.
We talked about the conference, our businesses, our goals, what we were building.
And then she asked me what sounded like a very simple question.
It wasn't.
She said something along the lines of:
"Okay. I get it. You're very clear about the business. You know what you're building. But let's say you're already there. You did it. You built the team. You accomplished all of it. Who is Maria? What brings Maria joy?"
Well...
My work brings me joy.
Genuinely.
There are few things that excite me more than building something and watching it grow. I find tremendous meaning there.
So I started answering.
And somehow, I felt like my answers weren't enough.
She asked about children.
I'm 39, currently more single than a dollar, and let's just say the dating department has been experiencing a prolonged drought. Lol.
But I don't feel like I'm missing something because I don't have children.
I wake up fired up about the vision I believe God placed in my heart.
That brings me joy.
Then she asked about love.
A boyfriend?
Dating?
And suddenly, what started as a casual conversation over a drink wasn't casual anymore.
Something in me cracked open.
And then her Uber arrived.
Probably at exactly the right time.
I felt like I couldn't breathe.
My mind was racing. My heart was racing. My soul felt like it was racing.
I didn't know whether I wanted to scream, cry, call someone, pray, journal, or go to the after-party at the House of Blues, listen to the live band, and have another drink.
Part of me wanted to evaporate.
Instead, I went back to my hotel room.
Room 8-217.
I looked at my computer.
Then my journal.
And I started writing.
I asked myself questions.
Then I opened ChatGPT.
One question became another.
And another.
And another.
For almost four hours, I wrote. Cried. Took notes. Sent emails. Set reminders. Asked questions. Sobbed. Laughed.
And somewhere in between all of it, I started saying:
Yes.
Yes.
YES.
Because I could feel myself getting closer to something.
Somewhere along the way, LA time passed midnight.
And there she was.
The woman in Room 8-217.
Me.
For the first time, I could answer the question:
Who is Maria?
And that's when something clicked.
I had come to Los Angeles expecting to learn how to become better at business.
Instead, I started wondering:
What if AI isn't only something we use to get more things done?
What if we can also use it to understand ourselves better?
To ask harder questions.
To challenge assumptions.
To organize thoughts we've carried around for years but never slowed down long enough to examine.
AI didn't give me my identity that night.
It helped me stay in the conversation with myself long enough to uncover what was already there.
And that brought me back to one of the major themes of the conference:
There's another 60% in you.
The conversation was largely about tapping into more of our capacity.
But my mind went somewhere else.
What if, instead of immediately asking how to do 60% more, we slowed down 60%?
What if we paused long enough to understand what's actually inside the reserves we already have?
For those of us who are builders and naturally driven, sometimes the answer isn't doing more.
Sometimes it's learning how to use what we already have more effectively.
I thought that was my breakthrough.
But I love how God works.
Because He often sends me confirmation.
Last year, during my trip to South Africa, I was reading The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself by Michael A. Singer.
I tend to read several books at a time. Some I finish quickly. Others I put down, go live a little, work on what I learned, and come back when I'm ready for more.
This was one of those books.
I still had a few chapters left, so I brought it with me to finish on the flight.
Then I reached Chapter 18:
The Secret of the Middle Way.
OMG.
There I was.
The chapter made me think about how much energy I had spent moving between extremes.
Pushing.
Stopping.
Pushing harder.
Burning out.
Starting again.
Somewhere along the way, I had convinced myself that speed was the answer.
I rarely stopped to smell the roses because I was too busy trying to get to wherever I had decided I needed to go next.
And suddenly, the conference, the woman from Arizona, Room 8-217, AI, my tears, my questions, and this unfinished book from South Africa all seemed to be having the same conversation with me.
Maybe accessing the next 60% of me isn't about doing 60% more.
Maybe it's about understanding myself well enough to use more of what's already there.
People often ask me why I spend money traveling to conferences and events.
My answer is simple:
Because I can't afford not to.
They don't just teach me.
They stir something in me.
They pull me out of my environment, interrupt my patterns, expose me to people I wouldn't otherwise meet, and sometimes make me pause long enough to hear myself.
I went to a real estate conference expecting to learn more about technology, AI, systems, business, and execution.
And one of my biggest takeaways had very little to do with doing more.
It was about understanding what's already there.
That night, after almost four hours of talking, writing, questioning, crying, and laughing, ChatGPT left me with these words:
"The woman who cried because she realized she isn't just building a business... she's building a legacy of hope. Don't ever lose her. She's worth protecting."
I haven't forgotten her.
The woman in Room 8-217.
Maybe AI won't tell you who you are.
But perhaps, if you ask better questions and are willing to sit with the answers, it can help you see what you've been too busy to notice.
So maybe the question isn't:
How do I do 60% more?
Maybe it's:
What am I carrying in my 60%?
—Maria Mendoza
Maria Mendoza is a Myrtle Beach real estate agent and team leader serving buyers and sellers throughout the Grand Strand. She writes about real estate, business, technology, personal growth, and the experiences that shape how she thinks, leads, and serves her clients.
